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‍October, Issue 2

‍Dear Visitor,

Last week, I gave a talk to a COPD support group about nutrition. During these talks, I like to point out that lung health is closely connected with the state of our gut — especially the tiny living organisms that call it home.

It always surprises me when people say they’ve never heard of gut microbes — especially given how much we now understand about how crucial the gut microbiome is for overall health, from immunity to mood.

If people living with chronic health conditions aren’t aware of this, how many grieving people don’t know either?

So today, I want to share some fundamental knowledge about these “hidden guests” that has helped make my grief journey a little easier — and that might change things for you too.

‍Every Bite Is a Choice

Inside your gut live trillions of tiny organisms—some helpful, some harmful. And every bite you eat feeds one group or the other.

Think of it like this: you wouldn’t put low-quality fuel in your car. You know it would damage the engine, reduce performance, and cost you more in the long run.

So why do we treat our bodies differently—especially when we’re grieving?

I often hear people say, “There’s no right way to grieve.”

And that’s absolutely true. But I can’t help wondering how often this is taken as permission to neglect our body and what we put into it.

When we don’t feel like cooking—and we often don’t—who is going to take care of our body?

When we don’t feel like shopping, how can we cook?

And if we don’t drink enough water, how can our body cope with all it’s already being asked to handle?

The truth is, stress depletes our beneficial bacteria. And the harmful ones may already have taken charge.

They’re clever — whispering to our brain, “Just one more treat,” making us believe we fancy a Bailey’s or some chocolate. But really, they’re just asking to be fed. And their favourite fuel? It’s sugar.

Here's what actually happens when we give in to those urges:

‍The Real Cost of "Treats"

Those chocolates and Bailey's? They feed the harmful bacteria in your gut. And when those bacteria thrive, they:

• Hijack your cravings – making you want more sugar, creating a vicious cycle
• Drain your energy – leaving you more exhausted than you already are
• Worsen mood swings – amplifying the emotional rollercoaster of grief
• Create brain fog – making it harder to think clearly or make decisions
• Trigger digestive discomfort – bloating, cramps, irregular bowel movements
• Weaken your immune system – when your body is already under enormous stress
  

You might think you’re treating yourself—but really, you’re treating the wrong crowd. The ones that make everything harder. 

‍There’s Another Choice

Now imagine feeding the other group—the beneficial bacteria that:

• Support steady energy throughout the day
• Help balance your mood and reduce anxiety
• Improve mental clarity so you can cope with daily challenges
• Strengthen digestion and reduce discomfort
• Support your immune system when your body needs it most
• Help you make better choices because your brain isn’t being hijacked by harmful microbes fighting for their survival.

These helpful organisms thrive on what Ayurveda calls naturally sweet-tasting foods—whole foods, fibre-rich vegetables, quality protein, ghee, or raw honey. These aren't sugary foods, but nourishing, building, comforting foods that truly satisfy.

With every bite, you’re choosing which group you're strengthening.

‍The Season Ahead

And here’s why this matters right now:

Over the next few weeks, there will be celebrations, gatherings, and plenty of tempting food and drinks.

On top of that? Emotional triggers at every turn. The empty chair. The traditions that hurt. The well-meaning questions you dread.

When you’re grieving, your body is already working incredibly hard. And this coming holiday season will challenge both your physical resilience and emotional capacity.

You have a choice: make things harder for yourself, or support yourself by nurturing the ‘friends’ in your gut.

‍My Question for You

So I’m asking you: Who do you want to feed during this season, when emotions run high?

The harmful bacteria that drain you, hijack your cravings, and make everything feel worse?

Or the beneficial ones that help you feel steadier, clearer, and more resilient during the hardest season of the year?

I’m not saying you can’t have chocolate or a glass of Bailey’s. I’m saying: understand what you’re choosing. Understand the real cost. And make decisions that truly support you—not the harmful bacteria that make grief even harder to bear.

Because you deserve to feel as steady and nourished as possible.

Not because it will take away your grief—nothing can do that—but because it will help you carry it.

Whenever I’m tempted, I pause and ask myself: “Who do I want to feed?”

This simple question helps me make the right choices. Perhaps it can become your compass too.

‍Next week, I'll share practical ways to feed the right bacteria during the holiday season—simple recipes, strategies, and bits of wisdom that really work to keep your emotions more stable in the most challenging time of the year.

In the meantime, take good care,

Sabine

‍Sabine Horner
77 Millfield Lane
York YO10 3AW
United Kingdom

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